Hey civilians. Today was my first day of basic training. I did well and liked it. No one told me I would have to work so hard though. Our maneuvers were pretty, well, basic, so far. How many times can one kid come and sit? I got a little bored with the repetition and went to play near a tree. My Drill Sergeant, Joe Goch, commanded me to “Drop and Give Him Twenty.” Twenty what? I don’t even know what that means. Thank goodness it didn’t mean sit-ups. I’d still be there.
It’s true what they say – women love a man in uniform. Two women walked by our training area and stopped to admire me. I even got a little pat on the head. Imagine if I had been wearing my camo sneakers that my mom refused to buy me……hearts would have been broken today.
After training I packed my gear and headed toward the barracks. What did I tell you???? Postage stamp size. There’s no way George Washington slept here. After I brought in my gear: my water bowl, treats, a bone, my new collar and leash, my old collar and leash and my dog tags, there wasn’t room for me and I’m a little guy. George had a good six feet on me easy. Maybe he slept with his feet hanging out the door.
After I unpacked, I was chauffeured to see the psychologist. I wasn’t in the seat five minutes before I was snoring.
When we got there, it turned out that the psychologist was my email buddy, my Tio Jonathan Cohen (J.C.). He’s a dear friend of mom’s and even though we had never met, he follows my blog and emails me a lot to check on mom and me. I got to see the temple, crystal garden and the water sanctuary honoring the Divine Feminine that he and Shari built on their property. I told J.C. that all feminines are divine in my humble opinion. Hahahahaha snort. Feminines. Hahahahaha. I crack myself up sometimes.
We had such a good time bonding. Yesterday was Tio J.C.’s birthday and I was his present. If he was analyzing me, he might say that was an awfully narcissistic thing to say. Guess what? I DON’T CARE! Snort! He gave me an ear rub, and treats, and played with me, and told me I was a sweet being with a big heart, and he told me I’m intelligent……and I in turn crawled onto his lap and gave him lots of pug kisses.
Don’t tell him I said this, but I don’t do that with just anybody. Only special people get my pug kisses – well only my mom really. And don’t tell my Drill Sergeant Joe that I said that. You know what the Army does to mama’s boys! Besides, pugs are a bit standoffish and I have a reputation to uphold.
So after playtime with J.C., I got back in the jeep and fell asleep again. I had been tired since training and didn’t run and explore much at Tio’s house. Frankly, I was on my best behavior because I know how psychologists analyze body language. I didn’t roll on the grass, lie down or paw at his arm when he stopped petting me. I woke up halfway home and started shrieking. Then I discovered my bone and went to town with it. Before I knew it I scrunched onto my cot safe and sound, resting for tomorrow’s training.