Whiskey Tango Foxtrot???

Eeks………gasp……cough……ACK…….snifffffffffffffffffff………………..whoooooooooo………..

Sniffffffffffffff…………….whoooooooooo………..

Inhale through my nose, exhale through my mouth. Deep breaths Pugsley………in and out………in and out………

Pardon me while I ground myself. I was on vacashun for a long weekend at my favorite place – Family Pet Resort while my mom staffed another Vets Journey Home retreat. More on that later.

I don’t mind it when my mom goes away for a good cause like helping our veterans. I DO mind it when I find out that she’s been CHEATING ON ME.

My mom picked me up Monday and I could see that she was really emotionally exhausted so when we got home I tucked her into bed. She proceeded to sleep for the next two days. Of course, she got up every so often to feed me and let me walk her, which I thought was very considerate. I smudged the house a few times to clear out all the residual energy that she brought home. While she was asleep I decided to help her by downloading the photos from her camera. That’s when I found THESE:

 20141116_010423~3_resized (2)

 20141116_010357~2_resized (4)

Who is this kid and why was she allowed to go on the retreat? AND WHY WAS MY MOM SNUGGLING WITH HER?

MOM! YOU’VE GOT SOME SPLAINING TO DO!

I jumped into mom’s bed and smacked her upside her head.

Mom told me the girl’s name is Tinkerbell and she’s a service dog. I have a lot of clothes and I don’t understand why I don’t have one of those red vests. I want one of those vests so that I can go all kinds of places where mere mortal dogs aren’t permitted to go.

My mom said that I would have to go away for a few weeks of intensive training. I’ve had lots of training and I already take care of so many services around here. I do all the scheduling and filing. I check mom’s emails and take care of her correspondence. How much more training do I need?

Mom said we could talk about me becoming a service dog when I learn “stay” and “come.” I know what stay and come mean. I just ignore them. I’m a free spirit; a freethinker, a nonconformist and a big furry ball of adventure. I like to do my own thing on my time.

Wait…….Will Uncle Colonel Ranger Robin train me? Oh yippee! I’ll get breakfast in bed at the Pheasant Field Bed & Breakfast and I’ll get to hang out with Aunt Kit and my pal Rehab. How soon can I go mom? Mom? Why are you ignoring me again? Mom?

I just checked; mom’s napping again. And I thought I napped a lot!

I’ll look at the rest of her photos.

OMG! I don’t even want to know what this is. My mom is such an embarrassment.

20141116_141606 (3)

You know that my mom is not allowed out without adult supervision. Who’s weekend was it to watch her? Auntie T? Uncle Mike? Uncle Jonathan? Can’t a kid go on vacashun without his mom acting all cray cray? (Note to self: No Tibetan singing bowl for mom for Hanukkah.)

Mom just woke up again and said she had a wonderful discussion with one of the Army veterans about military canines. He said that dogs don’t feel emotions like humans do.

Really? He never talked to me. My mom told him to come to our house and tell me about my inability to feel emotions. I feel lots of emotions: deep love, gratitude, compassion and happiness. I’m also capable of feeling boredom, anxiety and spitefulness. I’ve been known to jump onto the table and throw all of my mom’s papers and files on the floor. (That’s called filing.) Sometimes I grab for my treats on the kitchen counter, although recently I end up empty-pawed when I do that. Gee, I ate one whole chicken ONCE and needed emergency surgery and all of a sudden the treats are locked up in Fort Knox. Harumph! And I do lift my leg and tinkle on stuff in the house when mom goes fun places without me.

So who says that I don’t feel emotions? It’s my acting on them that seems to be problematic.

My mom told me she met so many wonderful people at her retreat. There are too many people to mention and mom said you know who you are.

HI EVERYONE! I’M PUGSLEY.

Mom sends a special shout out to a lovely lady named Sarah who came all the way from England to staff the weekend. Wow! That’s really far, isn’t it mom?

Mom, can we drive to Miss Sarah’s house in England one day so that I can meet her? Maybe she’ll take me to see the Queen.

What?

WHY DO YOU ALWAYS MAKE NEW FRIENDS WHO LIVE PLACES WHERE WE CAN’T DRIVE TO VISIT?

First there was Aunt Lisa who lives in Australia, then Miss Anna who lives in both England and Ireland and now Miss Sarah in England. It’s just not fair. Why don’t all of these places connect with roads?

What mom?

I DON’T KNOW ANY GEOPHYSICISTS!

Hey mom, who’s this? Mom said this is Breezy and he’s from Wisconsin. He made sure mom knew that his Packers were trouncing the Eagles. Boo Breezy Boo!

IMG_3665

Mom wanted to hear all about my vacashun.

I love my resort. I get to play with all the other kids, sunbathe, and I get so much attention from the resort concierges. I’m glad I’m a pug. All the ladies who work there crush on me and whenever it’s my nap time, they sneak into my suite for snuggles. Miss Linda came to my suite to play.

Here I am hanging out in my bed.

 Hi Miss Linda. Is it time for my group play now?

Here I am investigating Miss Linda’s phone.

Linda Hill Family Pet Resort 3 November 2014

And here I am with Miss Linda.

Linda Hill Family Pet Resort 1

Hey, where did you go Miss Linda? You cut yourself out of the picture. I can come back and teach you how to take selfies so that you’re in the picture with me.

Mom asked why I’m allowed to snuggle with other ladies and she can’t snuggle with other kids.

BECAUSE I’M PUGLSEY, THAT’S WHY!

MY WORLD – MY RULES!!!

And so you know, I don’t let just anybody into my world. You have to be pretty darn special.

So on this Thanksgiving Eve, mom and I are thankful for all the special, loving, magnificent people in our lives. Enjoy your Thanksgiving Day with your friends, family and football. May all your teams win (except you Cowboy fans. Sorry Aunt Teresa that means you!) GO EAGLES!

Cheerio, Pugsley

Mom, I’m learning proper English. Now can we go to visit Miss Sarah and Queen Elizabeth? May I ride on the London Eye? I want to see Big Ben too.

Mom?

Hey mom?

Where did you go?

Is there someplace near us where I can take polo lessons?

I’ll need a pony!

Mom? Moooooooooom………………….

Advertisements

It’s Good To Go and Good to Come Home*

Hey peeps. I’m back from my weekend away. I’ve been so busy catching up that I haven’t had time to write to tell you about my latest adventure.

To prepare for my trip, I had a spa day with my bestie Genna.

Rub A Dub Dub. Pugsley's In the Tub!

                Rub A Dub Dub. Pugsley’s In the Tub!

IMG_2336Don’t ask me what I was trying to reach. I don’t think there was food on the ceiling.

Here I am right after Genna brushed my teeth. I never noticed how freakishly long my tongue is. My cousin Craig noticed. And now I know why my pop-pop used to say he was going to sell my tongue in the deli.

IMG_2339OMG! Now my head looks freakishly big! I look just like those kids from Twisted Whiskers.  I gotta stop taking selfies.

IMG_2342Here I am with Genna after my massage and cuddle. Aren’t we cute?

IMG_2343I was all finished and waiting for mom to come get me. The ladies were  fighting over me. It got scary for a hot minute. The little ones were gnawing on each others’ ankles and climbing over each other to get to me. SECURITY!!!!!! I just can’t help being so darn handsome.

IMG_2345Mom and I left for our trip last Friday morning. First we went to Harrisburg to the League of Women Voters of PA Board meeting. Una Martone, the President of Leadership Harrisburg Area,  conducted a training for us so that we could be good board members and know what qualities are ideal to have when we recruit new board members. I learned so much and now I’m ready to be nominated for board appointments everyone. If you need my bio, email or text me.

Mom and Aunt Marita bunked together and Aunt Rae hung out with them after dinner. Aunt Rae brought me more breakfast bar treats from Doggie Delights in the West Shore Farmer’s Market.  She’s so nice to me. Next time I hope to meet her kids Pooky and Trixie. The big craft show took place at the Farm Show complex and I met so many nice people who went there and stayed at our hotel. Three women had a pajama party in the hotel lobby by the TV and fireplace. They stopped drinking their wine to play with me. I made a move toward a wine glass and they carded me. I hate when that happens!

The next morning while the ladies were at breakfast I pried open our refrigerator door and pulled out Friday’s leftovers. I opened the containers and ate the remaining half of mom’s turkey sandwich and the slice of cheesecake she took home from dinner. She won a free dessert in a contest. She’s so lucky….well, not really because I enjoyed her dessert after I finished my sandwich. Mom came back to the room to pick me up for the meeting before I could scarf down the container of breakfast bars. I was so full that I couldn’t assume my pawliamentarian duties and slept under the table most of the day. I really should stop being a glutton. I pooped green for two days and I didn’t even eat any green food!

Saturday afternoon we went to the Pheasant Field B&B to visit with Aunt Kitty, Uncle Robin and Rehab. I couldn’t wait to arrive. I had a bet with my friend Giovanni that this was going to be no ordinary family. I was sure that Aunt Kitty was a cat, Uncle Robin was well, obviously, a bird, a Colonel AND a bird, and I knew that Rehab was a dog. I wondered about this living arrangement. Giggle snort…..I was wrong. Aunt Kitty and Uncle Robin are two-legged people. Here we are sitting by the fire.IMG_2374I shared my treats with Rehab because my mom taught me that you should share your blessings. They told us that their B&B was a “station” on the Underground Railroad and showed us which floorboards covered the room where the slaves hid. You can see on this map that one route goes right through that area of Pennsylvania.detailedroutes We all hung out for a while and then Aunt Kit, Uncle Robin and mom went to dinner at Redd’s Smokehouse BBQ in downtown Carlisle. Mom said the ribs were stupid good. I don’t know Aunt Kelly – mom said Redd’s gives Rib Rack a run for its money. The rub was awesome and the sauce had a nice kick. I got my sloppy eating habits from my mom so I wasn’t surprised when she came home with barbeque sauce all over her shirt. I was happy to pre-wash. Yup…it was super yummy!

Uncle Robin, would you ask Redd’s the next time you go if they deliver to Philadelphia?

I watched Aunt Kit prep for breakfast even though mom said I was getting kibble. So much for my waffles and bacon. The whole house smelled like cinnamon. I climbed on Rehab’s back to get high enough to look through to the kitchen. She’s a good sport. Don’t tell anyone…..we kissed once when our parents weren’t looking.  Snort….she’s so pretty.

Uncle Robin and mom worked on some Vets Journey Home stuff and then it was time for bed. We stayed in the Country Comfort cottage. Mom and I both loved it and slept so well. In the morning, mom put me in the bathroom and closed the pocket door so that I wouldn’t tinkle on the bed or the carpet.

Mom had breakfast with Rehab. It was so sweet of her to keep mom company. Aunt Kit made a baked apple, cheese strata and sausage and apple hash that mom said was AMAZING! Recipes please Aunt Kit?!

When mom came back to the room – HA! – I showed her. I had opened the pocket door and was looking out the door to our room. It takes a lot more than a closed door to keep me in place. Tio Jonathan calls me Houdini. Maybe I’ll have my DNA tested. It could be possible.

Mom took me to watch the horses have breakfast……….

IMG_2352

IMG_2355………and then we went to walk the Labyrinth. In medieval times, the labyrinth symbolized a hard path to God with a clearly defined center (God) and one entrance (birth). Labyrinths can symbolize a pilgrimage where people can walk the path, ascending toward salvation or enlightenment. Mom and I meditated and made wishes during our walk.

Bidden or not bidden, God is present. Carl Jung the psychologist had this quote carved over the door of his home in Switzerland.

Bidden or not bidden, God is present. Carl Jung had this quote carved over the door of his home in Switzerland.

IMG_2364We came upon something curious. Uncle Robin, I think you have a bear on your land. This is waaaay to large to be Rehab’s footprint and I know it’s not mine. It’s ginormous. You can see the long pointy claw prints too.

IMG_2365Pheasant Field is so beautiful. We want to go back when it’s not snowing and sit by the lake.

IMG_2361IMG_2356IMG_2360 IMG_2357IMG_2359After our walk, mom and I went back to our room and fell asleep. Country Comfort is an understatement. The chambermaid thought something happened to mom because she said she knocked on the door and mom didn’t answer. I keep telling everyone that’s why when mom’s alarm goes off in the morning I have to walk over her a few times and lick her face until she’s awake. She such a sound sleeper. Everyone knows it. You have to throw her out of bed. Uncle Robin, can you hook me up with a bugle? Maybe if I play Revilie in her ear……

Our cottage

                  Our cottage

The snow postponed our field trip to the Carlisle Barracks, home of the U.S. Army War College. Uncle Robin was going to take me on a 15 mile run after breakfast. Hahahahaha….I hope he planned to carry me 14 1/2 of those miles.

Before we left, Uncle Robin said that I could take home the Pheasant Field doggie dish that he gave me. Now I’ll be able to remember my trip every time I eat. It makes me smile.

So mom and I started our 4 1/2 hour trek home in the snowstorm, 2 1/2 hours longer than it should have been. Fortunately, mom always has snacks for both of us. We heard on the radio about all of the accidents back home (any time you’re ready with the salt trucks PennDOT) and also listened to the Eagles game and an audio book. The Eagles and Lions were playing in a whiteout. The Eagles came from behind to win. Yippee! Fly Eagles Fly! Aunt Teresa called from Fort Worth to tell us about the storm at home. Of course, she was on Day 4 of her captivity because of the same storm that hit them with ice. I haven’t heard from her; I hope she’s out of the house by now. When you run out of chocolate, put on the ice skates and make a break for the closest 7-11.

That’s all the news from here. Happy trails!

Love, Pugsley

*Nana Jay used to say this every time she came home from a trip. I write this in her memory.